I’m a big I Love Lucy fan (judge all you want; it’s an awesome show) and the other day I happened to catch part of the episode where Ricky puts Lucy on a schedule. After laughing quite a bit at the humor and absurdity of such a ridiculous schedule, it hit me… I have a similar set up that I’ve created for myself.
Truly, it’s quite possible that I suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder and would likely benefit from Prozac or maybe at the very least a bottle of wine (haha). I am slightly obsessed with time and planning. Everything in my life is on a schedule. I have more than three ongoing to-do lists (by priority and subject of course). And I probably couldn’t survive without my Google calendar (which is also set up with 11 different calendars/categories: i.e. birthdays, anniversaries, blog tasks, portrait sessions, personal events, etc.).
So… Highly organized, or a touch OCD?
Sad, but true, I can tell you what I will be doing at any given moment because I don’t stray far from this schedule. I don’t remember being quite this crazy before becoming a mom. However, after a great deal of trial and error over Olivia’s struggle with sleep (I’m talking major battles here), I have come to value a schedule. (It seems to help …a little.) I have calculated blocks of time for every hour of my day, from getting up and ready in the morning, when nap time is, to how much time dinner needs to cook. I can even estimate, fairly accurately, how long a grocery shopping trip will take. And in all that scheduling, I also plan ahead for what I need to accomplish during nap time so that I am able to cram in as much as possible while I have some toddler-free hours.
I guess I feel that I have no time to waste and seldom any to spare. “Free-time”…? Yep; you guessed it, that’s planned out too (if it’s available). Heck, I started this post on my phone while brushing my teeth and thinking of what I needed to accomplish this week. I constantly have to remind myself to SLOW DOWN, breathe, and take in the moment instead of mentally racing to my next task – in all aspects of my life: day to day things, photography, even conversations (I get ahead of myself and my mouth can’t keep up with my brain). I always seem to be in a multitasking frenzy. I actually fantasize about having a few solid days of solitude and no interruptions because I’m sure I could accomplish sooooo much. – Sick, I know.
So this year I’ve decided to do something I don’t normally do – I’m going to try out the whole New Year’s resolution thing, or some goals, if you will… Ordinarily I don’t partake in this tradition because I’m already constantly trying to improve myself anyway (I have a to-do list for that too). However, I think my goal will be to concentrate on chilling out and finding time for myself. Perhaps I’ll give meditation a try and see if I can do absolutely nothing for 10 minutes every now and then. (Yikes – who would have thought relaxing could be so difficult?) I’ve been working on finding inner peace for awhile now, but I haven’t really been able to map it out… So my plan (there’s always a plan) is to work on myself in 2017 by doing the following:
2017 Goals
- Improve upon my prayer relationship with God (I certainly can’t do this alone)
- Make more time to spend with family and friends
- Start meditating
- Practice Yoga more
- Exercise
- Eat healthier
- Read novels (instead of all work and no play stuff)
- Maybe start coloring – ? (adult coloring books seem to be all the rage these days…)
- Learn to say “no” and start turning down commitments that are stressful
- Stop working on things that don’t make me happy
- Take more pictures for enjoyment
- Watch a movie (or two, or three)
Of course the to-do-lists won’t accomplish themselves and I still have lots of projects and dreams, so there will always be something I need to work on. Responsibilities and dreams won’t, and shouldn’t, magically disappear. However, my hope is to take more time outs, and learn to take better care of myself. We shall see how it goes… Wish me luck! (I’ll need it.)