Panic started to bubble up as I struggled to free myself. I was stuck in my shirt. (No joke.) The more I fought, the more I started to get that irrational claustrophobic feeling that constrictive clothing gives me, and I was praying that I didn’t have to cut it off just so I could go take an ever-loving shower. I liked this particular shirt. After a few more tries, in utter desperation, I poked my head out of the bedroom and asked Kendall if he could help me. He obliged, but not without teasing me (he’s such a smart ass) – along with some chiding since he’d been suggesting that I go to the doctor for quite a while…
You see, the issue was not the unforgiving fabric of the garment, but rather my inability to raise my arm up over my head. About two months ago, I awoke one morning to find my shoulder to be inexplicably FUBARed (A.K.A. f’d up beyond all recognition). I honestly don’t know what the hell is wrong with it, but it hurts like crazy and my mobility is extremely limited. Now… I have, on occasion, been known to run into the coffee table, or do some other stupid and painful thing, and later wonder where the heck I got the resulting bruise from (apparently my memory sucks). However, I think I’d remember severely jacking up my shoulder like this. Kendall likes to tell me it’s because I’m getting old, and says, “wait till I get his age” (*eyeroll* he’s only 5 months older). I’d smack him if doing so wouldn’t hurt my shoulder.
After about a month of pain and not sleeping well, I finally asked my primary care doctor about it. The appointment only resulted in an order for an x-ray because apparently insurance won’t cover anything until you have that done (which is total B.S.). Since I truly didn’t think it was an issue with my bones, I stubbornly put it off. I didn’t see any point in paying for a procedure that wouldn’t help. My family felt differently. Every time Kendall and Olivia witnessed me wincing, they would chime in with a, “hey, maybe you should go to the doctor…” So, after another month of it not magically getting better all on its own (I’d had high hopes…), I decided to swing by the urgent care clinic to see what they might have to say about it, and to finally get a dumb x-ray.
I’d like to say that the visit was more productive than my last experience, but it wasn’t. Evidently, I remain a mystery… As I suspected, the x-ray was fine. I mentioned to the doctor that I was concerned I’d somehow messed up my rotator cuff, or perhaps it was the “frozen shoulder” thing that I’d found in my research. After the doctor consulted the screen on her phone (I guess they downsized from laptops), she agreed that it could potentially be frozen shoulder (yes; that’s an actual medical term), but since no one has any idea what causes it, there is no cure, and she wasn’t even sure that was the issue, she couldn’t offer much help. Also, if this is in fact my problem, I just have to ride it out and hope it gets better in a year or so (it can actually be 1 – 3 years!).
If that wasn’t super news in and of itself…. Guess who gets frozen shoulder. Women going through menopause! Oh, and folks with thyroid issues. Lovely. I’m used to my autoimmune disease kicking my ass all over the place, but essentially being diagnosed as old is kind of a bummer – though it’s infinitely better than being pronounced dead!
Anyway, I guess I’ll see what happens. I’m just hoping my daughter’s big, pink, kitty Squishmallow isn’t a permanent fixture in my bed (as my nightly arm prop). And at some point, I’d really love to be able to put on my bra like a normal person. (It’s like a regular Houdini act every morning.) So, I’m fervently praying that this does indeed magically heal on its own (and quickly!) whatever the heck it is. Particularly since no one seems to know what’s wrong with me.
So… If you happen to see me out and about, and I don’t wave – it’s not that I’m being stuck up, I just well… can’t (haha).
Hope this gave you a chuckle, and that you have an awesome day!
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